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What to Do When Mediation Just Isn’t Working

Posted on : May 18, 2016

Mediation can be an excellent way for couples to reach a compromise about various issues in their divorce, including property division and child custody. However, mediation doesn’t necessarily solve every problem. For some families, mediation just doesn’t work. Here are signs that mediation might not be progressing for you and what you can do next.

Signs Mediation Might Not Be Working for Your Family

There are a few ways to tell if mediation just isn’t cutting it for your particular situation:

  • You have not reached an agreement on any issues you intended to mediate, even after hours of discussion
  • You and your ex-spouse keep discussing the things over and over again without ever reaching a resolution or a compromise
  • You and your ex-spouse are attacking each other personally, making catty comments, or just not being conducive to the conversation and using mediation as an outlet for anger and frustration
  • You and your ex-spouse begin talking about other topics unrelated to the issues you came to mediate

What Isn’t a Sign of Mediation Not Working?

Mediation is about compromise, but when you begin compromising on a lot of issues, you may feel like you aren’t getting your way or you are losing ground. This isn’t a sign that mediation isn’t working — it’s a sign that it is. Reaching resolutions requires compromise, and in some cases, one party must compromise more than the other. Often, this is for the benefit of children who are involved in the divorce.

What Are Your Options if Mediation Isn’t Working?

The first thing you should do if you feel like you aren’t getting anywhere with mediation is to take a break. Whether it’s for an hour or for a week, you should take some time to regroup your thoughts outside of the heat of the situation. You can come back with a clear head and try again — and this time, you may be able to make more progress.

If you and your ex-spouse have truly reached an impasse and neither of you are willing to compromise on a particular matter, you may need to proceed to litigation. Your divorce lawyer can help you. But litigating one matter doesn’t necessarily mean you have to litigate the whole divorce — it’s perfectly possible to resolve most issues in mediation and only go to court for one or two issues.

Contact Mindi Lasley, P.A. if you are interested in mediation or feel like mediation just might not be working for your family. She can provide the representation you need to move forward. Call now for a consultation at (813) 873-9047.

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