Learning how to effectively co-parent your children after divorcing your spouse can seem difficult, if not impossible. This is particularly true if your marriage ended on less-than-positive terms. However, co-parenting well is in the best interest of your children, and will help them to grow up feeling loved and nurtured by both parents. Here are some ways you can begin co-parenting effectively after a divorce.
1. Realize You Love Your Children More Than You Don’t Like Your Ex-Spouse
You may be at odds with your ex-spouse, and may not even stand being in the same room with him/her. However, you also love your children, and you certainly love them more than you hate your ex-spouse. Keep that in mind when dealing with your ex-spouse; look at your ex-spouse through your children’s eyes instead of your own. They love that person, and that person is an integral part of their identity and emotional support. Understanding this can make it easier to remain civil with your ex-spouse when you need to.
2. Don’t Put Your Kids In the Middle
As tempting as it is to say, “Tell your father such-and-such” or to hand them a note to deliver to your ex-spouse so you don’t have to speak with them, it’s very detrimental to your children if they get caught in the middle. If you and your ex-spouse need to communicate regarding a matter, confront each other personally and do it away from the children. You don’t necessarily have to pretend that you and your ex-spouse are on great terms in front of your children, but it’s important to maintain civility and politeness and keep your children from being involved in matters that should only be between you and your ex-spouse.
3. Be Positive About Your Ex-Spouse
As hard as it may be, your ex-spouse is still your child’s other parent. Be positive about them in your child’s presence, or at the very least, try hard not to be negative. Don’t allow your child to become influenced by your emotions during and after the divorce.
Divorce is always difficult, even if you and your spouse have decided together that parting ways is the best option for you. It is particularly challenging when children are involved. Get the support you need by contacting an experienced divorce attorney like Mindi Lasley, P.A. Call now for a consultation to discuss your legal needs at (813) 873-9047.